Saturday, February 28, 2015
FAIRFIELD-SUISUN, CALIFORNIA
99 CENTS

I’ll fight for equality for all moms

borchert column sig

By
From page A2 | May 22, 2014 |

A friend of mine retired last year from her job of 20 years to become a stay-at-home at the ripe old age of 45. Not so many of us are that lucky, but she’s living the dream now. Young, all the time in the world and kids who still appreciate her being around.

She spends her days volunteering at the school and boy, does she volunteer. She makes me look lazy. That school is lucky to have her.

My friend, however, is in the minority. According to the Pew Research Center, 29 percent of women were stay-at-home moms in 2012. I haven’t decided yet if that number is high. All I know is that the 71 percent of us who go to work every day feel like we are in the minority.

I have never attended a PTA meeting at my daughter’s school. My dad’s retirement celebration happened at 3:30 p.m. My daughter’s softball practice is at 4:30 p.m. My youngest daughter has been asking me for two years to sign her up for dance class, but I can’t. The class is consistently offered at 10:30 a.m. on a Tuesday.

Teachers and school administrators are always asking for parent volunteers for events, committees and classrooms. But all their coordination meetings are right after school. At least they are at our school. Another friend of mine, who has bent over backward to volunteer at the school, voiced her opinion about the inconvenient parent/teacher meetings.

The response she got?

“Well, a lot of our teachers live out of town and it’s easier for them to meet after school.” I can only speak about our school, but it doesn’t seem that schools are accommodating working families.

Let’s not forget . . . there are 71 percent of us working moms who would still help out if we were chronologically capable of doing so.

I got very lucky that the group of moms who came into my Girl Scout troop were all working when we became a troop. We meet in the evenings, after sports practices and even dinner are done for the night. Most troops meet right after school. My mom reminded me that when I was in Girl Scouts, back in the day, our troop met right after school in Cleo Gordon Elementary School’s gym.

So, even though there are 71 percent of us working moms out there, it will never feel like it. There will always be practices at times that force us to rush home, grab our kids and practically throw them out of the car while stuffing a PB&J sandwich in their hand for dinner. The best classes for our toddlers will take place at times that accommodate those who aren’t in day care.

I will have to read the many colorful fliers that are sent home with my daughter to know what’s going on with the PTA. If I want to suggest a fundraiser or offer to help out with an event, I will send a faceless email to someone I have never met and hope they get back to me and accept my offer.

Times are changing. It’s great that so many women are able to stay home with their kids. I did it for a while. It’s not for me. I don’t, however, want to feel like I am being punished for choosing to work. The word equality is thrown around a lot lately and this is a great time to use it.

Angela Borchert is a freelance writer who lives in Vacaville. Reach her at [email protected].

LEAVE A COMMENT

Discussion | 4 comments

The Daily Republic does not necessarily condone the comments here, nor does it review every post. Read our full policy

  • the minorityMay 22, 2014 - 7:01 am

    Find a new place for your toddler to go to dance, adjust your work hours for the PTA meetings, or if these things are that big of a deal to you then quit your job. Don't be so self centered to expect the world to change for you because you want to work. Are you doing the best thing for your family by working or just for your company and yourself? I doubt I will ever hear a child say "mommy I'm glad you're going to work today".

    Reply | Report abusive comment
  • Adam HenryMay 22, 2014 - 8:10 am

    I'm right there with you Angela and I don't even have children. I get so sick and tired of hearing women claim they're a "full-time mom" and they don't work. I'm sorry, but you're a stay at home mother. Being a parent is a full-time job for the rest of your life. Growing up, both of my parents worked full-time AND were full-time parents. They had to work to provide for us and we understood that. To "the minority" what about fathers out there? Why should they work while the women stay home? Couldn't the man stay at home while the woman works? You are stuck in the wrong decade. Not too many families nowadays can afford to have a parent stay at home and for those that can, the burden of staying healthy and able to work is huge.

    Reply | Report abusive comment
  • MomMay 22, 2014 - 8:42 am

    Complain, complain, complain. So to solve the inequality issues how about we cancel all activities like dance, story time, any meeting that has to do with children and wait until all working parents are home? Lets make the teachers who teach/babysit your children all day come back to school in the evening to accommodate your schedule. Forget their families, they can run home, shove a PB&J in their children's hands and race back to school. Every choice we make has a consequence; if you choose to stay home, you sacrifice the camaraderie and stimulation of being surrounded by other adults at work. If you choose to work, you will sacrifice the 10:00am dance class, the volunteering at your child's school. That's life.

    Reply | Report abusive comment
  • April MassettMay 23, 2014 - 9:48 am

    I'm sure the decision to work outside the home or stay home is a difficult one for all involved! Finances, schedules, the needs of your kids or spouse, plus your own personal preferences all play a part in deciding what you will do. I get what you're saying though... That you wish you didn't have to give up all of the good of one to have the other. I do have some ideas, however! I think there are others like you who need to work during the day, yet want to be involved. What if you found a parent/PTA meeting member that went to the daytime meeting that wouldn't mind meeting with you working parents as a group in the evening and fill you in on the happenings and get your input? You all could meet at someone's home, have coffee and dessert and get crackin' on school news! (I do believe you've inspired me to suggest this at our school). As for lessons, camps and classes, some of us stay at home friends would be happy to take your kiddos to their events. I know that wouldn't solve the issue of you not bring there. But we have camera phones, video phones and face time! Be creative and ask for help from those of us who are able to stay at home. We'd love to spread the blessing! Thanks for the article!

    Reply | Report abusive comment
.

US / World

 
Man shoots wife, himself at Northern Calif. retirement home

By The Associated Press | From Page: A3

 
Thieves crash car through electronics store in San Francisco

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

 
Some California farmers to go without federal water

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4, 2 Comments | Gallery

US appeals court: Marathon bombing trial can stay in Boston

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Congress OKs 1-week bill to keep Homeland Security open

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5, 2 Comments | Gallery

US rescinds rule requiring judges to move to Guantanamo

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
US, Liberia start 1st formal test of ZMapp Ebola virus drug

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Woman knocked out by eggs

By The Associated Press | From Page: A9

Unmasking of ‘Jihadi John’ as a London lad shocks Britain

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10

 
Mexico official: Police capture top capo ‘La Tuta’ Gomez

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10 | Gallery

Well-educated ‘Jihadi John’ no surprise to experts

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10

 
.

Opinion

How GOP can resolve immigration mess

By Ramesh Ponnuru | From Page: A8, 8 Comments

 
Unlikely winners of Greece’s surrender on euro

By Mark Gilbert | From Page: A8

A remedy for veterans’ care

By Bill Frist And Jim Marshall | From Page: A8

 
Editorial Cartoon: Feb. 28, 2015

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

.

Living

Today in History: Feb. 28, 2015

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

 
Community Calendar: Feb. 28, 2015

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A2

Horoscopes: Feb. 28, 2015

By Holiday Mathis | From Page: A7

 
Poem about heaven helps dog owners when beloved pet dies

By Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar | From Page: A7, 1 Comment

Coca-Cola bottle as art? Atlanta’s High Museum takes a look

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

 
.

Entertainment

 
TVGrid

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B9

.

Sports

Thompson scores 25 points, Warriors rout Raptors 113-89

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
Casey McGehee’s move to Giants a homecoming of sorts

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
Vaca advances three wrestlers into semis at Masters

By Daily Republic staff | From Page: B1

 
Spurs snap 4-game skid, beat short-handed Kings 107-96

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

MLS Commissioner Garber: Hopeful season will start on time

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Travis Kvapil’s NASCAR car stolen from hotel before race

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

McIlroy to miss cut at Honda Classic; Reed leads

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
NHL fines Sharks’ Couture $5,000 for tripping from behind

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Browns agree to terms with quarterback Josh McCown

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Kyle Busch released from hospital following foot surgery

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Bulls expect Derrick Rose back this season from knee surgery

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Testimony: Several Hernandez texts are missing from phone

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Approaching ‘last call’ for NHL GMs to tweak rosters

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

PGA Tour to move Match Play to Texas

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Notre Dame president credited for transforming school dies

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
This date in sports history for Saturday, Feb. 28, 2015

By The Associated Press | From Page: B4

.

Business

Gas prices soar in California as supply shrinks

By The Associated Press | From Page: A1, 1 Comment | Gallery

 
5 reasons US economy is stronger than Q4 GDP suggests

By The Associated Press | From Page: B5 | Gallery

Tribes from around US gather to discuss legal marijuana

By The Associated Press | From Page: B5

 
Uber says database containing driver info was breached

By The Associated Press | From Page: B5

Signed contracts to buy US homes rise to 18-month high

By The Associated Press | From Page: B5

 
Fiat Chrysler recalls 467K SUVs for possible stalling

By The Associated Press | From Page: B5

 
Southwest nearly done inspecting planes that were grounded

By The Associated Press | From Page: B5

.

Obituaries

Gabriel T. Traub

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4, 1 Comment

 
Maria Kraszewski

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

.

Comics

Dilbert

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Wizard of Id

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Baby Blues

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Frank and Ernest

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

B.C.

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Peanuts

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Rose is Rose

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Zits

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Pickles

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Baldo

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Sally Forth

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Garfield

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Blondie

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
For Better or Worse

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Get Fuzzy

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Beetle Bailey

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Cryptoquote

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A7

 
Sudoku

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A7

Bridge

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A7

 
Crossword

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A7

Word Sleuth

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A7

 
.

Home Seller 2/28/2015

Right at Home: Decor made of bicycle parts

By The Associated Press | From Page: HSR2Comments are off for this post | Gallery

Real estate transactions for Feb. 28, 2015

By Daily Republic | From Page: HSR3

Average US rate on 30-year mortgage rises to 3.80 percent

By The Associated Press | From Page: HSR3