Wednesday, January 28, 2015
FAIRFIELD-SUISUN, CALIFORNIA
99 CENTS

Why do parents drink alcohol after their children’s games?

Dear Annie: I have a question for parents. Why, when the kids’ soccer, football or baseball games are over, do the parents open up the trunks of their cars and get out the beer? Tailgate parties with alcohol do not belong at children’s events.

When my children played sports, we went out for ice cream. Alcohol was not permitted before or after. What kind of behavior is this teaching our children? Where are the police? They have to know this is happening. Their children play sports, too. Not to mention, these same parents put their children in the car and drive home after drinking in the parking lot. Please explain this to me. — Concerned Grandparent

Dear Concerned: There is no rational explanation. These parents are irresponsible and idiotic. The organizations or schools that sponsor the sports should issue rules about parental behavior before, during and immediately after the games, and you (or the parents of your grandchildren) should request that it be done.

Dear Annie: My niece recently married her live-in boyfriend. They chose to marry in another country, but didn’t send any announcements or invitations. That’s fine, because it was expensive.

When one aunt who could afford the plane fare and hotel asked whether she could attend, she was told “no.” The only guests were the parents. The aunt was deeply hurt. I felt bad for her and angry with the bridal couple for being so rude. When they returned to the states, another family member asked whether there would be a reception and was told there wouldn’t be.

Now they are hinting for presents. My sister-in-law asked me to go in with her to purchase a rather expensive gift, and I refused because of the way they treated the aunt. My family is angry with me. Frankly, I never want to hear from that niece again. Am I wrong? — Ex-Auntie

Dear Ex: Yes. The bridal couple can invite whomever they wish, and if they choose a small, immediate-family-only wedding with no stateside reception, that is up to them. The aunt was wrong to ask for an invitation simply because she could afford it. If they wanted extended family to be there, they would have invited everyone.

For most folks, if you are not invited to a wedding, you are not obligated to give a gift. But this is family, and yours is trying to be gracious and happy for the newlyweds by giving a gift. If you don’t wish to contribute, that’s up to you. But please don’t cut off your niece because you didn’t approve of her guest list. At least send a card with your best wishes.

Dear Annie: I read the letter from “California Dreamin’, whose husband is overweight. My husband and I have been married for 49 years, and he, too, has gained a considerable amount of weight.

I try to cook healthy meals, but my efforts are sabotaged when he adds butter and salt. He has been counseled by his physician many times, to no avail. Twelve years ago, he had a massive hemorrhagic stroke that left him with severe deficits. Yet he continues to refuse to do what is needed to be as healthy and mobile as he can be. He is comfortable sitting in his chair watching TV.

This has put an incredible amount of strain on me. I can’t tell you how much time, effort and money has been spent helping him to be more mobile with less physical stress on my fibromyalgic body. But I love this man with my whole heart. I take our marriage vows seriously, and I cannot imagine my life without him. I will continue to care for him until death do us part. I am not writing for sympathy. I accept my life as a gift from God, and I accept caregiving as my gift to others. — Still in Love

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 Third St., Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.

 

Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar

LEAVE A COMMENT

Discussion | No comments

The Daily Republic does not necessarily condone the comments here, nor does it review every post. Read our full policy

  • Recent Articles

  • Enter your email address to subscribe and receive notifications of new posts by email.

  • .

    Solano News

     
    Youngster battles brain cancer a 2nd time

    By Susan Winlow | From Page: A1 | Gallery

     
    2 Solano road projects get green light

    By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A1

     
    Rush Ranch seeks docents

    By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A2

    Health officials report 1st Solano flu death

    By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A3, 5 Comments | Gallery

     
    Kroc Health Fair offers free screenings

    By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A3

     
    Fairfield police to offer parenting class

    By Ian Thompson | From Page: A4

    Frazier schedules coffee in Suisun City

    By Ryan McCarthy | From Page: A4, 2 Comments

     
    Vacaville police to offer law enforcement academy

    By Ian Thompson | From Page: A4

    Vanden to host science fair

    By Bill Hicks | From Page: A4

     
    Woman with Solano ties caught up in tax fraud case

    By Jess Sullivan | From Page: A4

     
     
     
    Coalition members review tobacco control report card

    By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A5

    Vacaville Toastmasters welcome guests

    By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A6

     
    Chipotle fundraiser to benefit Armijo newspaper

    By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A6, 3 Comments

     
    American Legion Post schedules head-shaving fundraiser

    By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A6

     
    Dramas, thrillers lead week’s box office openings

    By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: B8

     
    Fairfield police log: Jan. 24, 2015

    By Susan Hiland | From Page: A12

    Suisun City police log: Jan. 26, 2015

    By Susan Hiland | From Page: A12

     
    Suisun City police log: Jan. 25, 2015

    By Susan Hiland | From Page: A12

    Suisun City police log: Jan. 24, 2015

    By Susan Hiland | From Page: A12

     
    Fairfield police log: Jan. 26, 2015

    By Susan Hiland | From Page: A12

    Fairfield police log: Jan. 25, 2015

    By Susan Hiland | From Page: A12

     
    .

    US / World

    Gold nuggets stolen in smash and grab

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A7

     
    CSU chancellor looks to increase graduation rates

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A8

    Officials lose track of billions in funding

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A8, 1 Comment

     
    Bill would treat e-cigs the same as regular cigarettes

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A8

     
    NTSB: Systemic flaws in safety oversight of gas pipelines

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A14

     
    Catholic church in San Francisco to phase out altar girls

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A14

    Military has wide discretion on Bergdahl charges

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A14, 1 Comment

     
    Gunmen storm Libya hotel, killing American, 9 others

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A14

    Famed civil rights protesters to have arrest records erased

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A14

     
    Secret talks in Jordan try to win release of hostages

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A14

    ‘Wicked storm': Blizzard drops 2 feet of snow on New England

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A14

     
    .

    Opinion

     
     
    .

    Living

    Community Calendar: Jan. 28, 2015

    By Susan Hiland | From Page: A2

     
    Today in History: Jan. 28, 2015

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

    Horoscope Jan. 28, 2015

    By Holiday Mathis | From Page: B6

     
    We live close to my nephew but he chooses to remain distant

    By Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar | From Page: B6

     
    10 Things: 10 fresh takes on Super Bowl guacamole

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B7

     
    .

    Entertainment

    Christina Aguilera to perform ahead of NBA All-Star Game

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

     
    Common, John Legend to perform ‘Glory’ at Academy Awards

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

    Katie Holmes to guest on ‘Ray Donovan’

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

     
    .

    Sports

    Lynch at Media Day: ‘I’m here so I don’t get fined’

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

     
    Falcon boys drop 69-61 SCAC loss to Bethel

    By Marcus Lomtong | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    Local Report: Armijo boys roll past Napa 69-41

    By Daily Republic staff | From Page: B1, 1 Comment

    Nadal loses; Sharapova to play all-Russian semi in Australia

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

     
    Belichick and The Beast talk but don’t say much at Media Day

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

    Deflated topic: air pressure in footballs

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B1, 1 Comment

     
    Rose’s shot lifts Bulls over Warriors 113-111 in overtime

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B1 | Gallery

     
    Golfer Allenby stands by story, says truth will come out

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

    Tony Stewart returns with a swagger not seen in 2 years

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

     
    Shooters find not every basketball is same in college game

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

    Patrick heads into 2015 in final season with team, sponsor

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

     
    Manfred hopeful of A’s getting new ballpark in Oakland

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

    Christina Aguilera to perform ahead of NBA All-Star Game

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

     
    Super Bowl, Tiger make Phoenix center of sports universe

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

    Long after Twitter feud, Revis, Sherman pledge respect

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

     
    The distinctive international flavor of Super Bowl Media Day

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

    Serena Williams advances, Venus out of Australian Open

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

     
    Getting fired from New England led to Carroll’s reinvention

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

    Sharks in ‘dogfight’ to secure playoff berth

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

     
    Jury convicts 2 ex-Vanderbilt players of raping woman

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

     
    Rio official says there’s ‘no plan B’ for Olympic sailing

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

     
    This date in sports history for Jan. 28, 2015

    By The Associated Press | From Page: B4

     
    .

    Business

    US home price gains slow in November on weaker sales

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A14

     
    FTC clears Albertsons’ purchase of Safeway

    By The Associated Press | From Page: A14

    .

    Obituaries

    Joseph Phillip Raiff

    By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

     
    Clarence E. Morgan

    By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

    Don Johnson

    By Nancy Green | From Page: A4, 9 Comments

     
    Dzhon Athanc

    By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

    Julia P. Tan

    By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

     
    Woodrow Allen Oakley

    By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

    Donald Wesley Johnson

    By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

     
    .

    Comics

    Beetle Bailey

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

     
    Baby Blues

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

    Frank and Ernest

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

     
    B.C.

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

    Baldo

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

     
    Blondie

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

    Dilbert

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

     
    Rose is Rose

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

    Get Fuzzy

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

     
    Wizard of Id

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

    Peanuts

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

     
    Zits

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

    Garfield

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

     
    Sally Forth

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

    For Better or Worse

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

     
    Pickles

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

    Bridge

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

     
    Word Sleuth

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

    Sudoku

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

     
    Cryptoquote

    By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6