Wednesday, July 23, 2014
FAIRFIELD-SUISUN, CALIFORNIA
99 CENTS

My mother wants me to contact my half-siblings, but I don’t want to

Dear Annie: I recently decided to do a little digging into my past and started a family tree. While I was doing this, I came across information that my biological father had passed away some 10 years ago.

Annie, I had no contact with my biological father after the age of 2. He had an affair with my mother and then went back to his wife. I don’t even know what he looked like. In all honesty, I have no feelings about his passing. I have never regretted not meeting him.

The reason I am writing is that he had two children by the woman he was married to while seeing my mother on the side. I doubt they even know that my two younger brothers and I exist, especially since he went out of his way to deny having fathered us in the first place.

My mother suggested I contact these now-grown children and let them know about us. I do not think this is a good idea and prefer to leave well enough alone. Your thoughts? — Curious in Minnesota

Dear Curious: We agree with you to leave things alone. We assume you have relevant medical information about your biological father. Does your mother have a photograph of him so you can satisfy any curiosity you have about what he looked like? These children may deeply resent learning that their father had an affair that produced siblings, and developing a relationship with you could be too painful for them. If they do know about you, they can do the same search you are considering, so we’d let them make that decision.

Dear Annie: My wife reads the paper daily, so I’m hoping you can get through to her. She has put on more than 100 pounds since our two kids were born.

I would like to tell her I love her and worry about her health. We talk about growing old together and all the things we will get to experience with our children. They are now at a great age to travel, and we can enjoy their sporting events. My wife exercises a little but cannot refuse a cookie, brownie or piece of cake. I try to lead by example by exercising regularly, eating no goodies and keeping watch over my health. I want us to take long walks and grow old together.

Thank you for printing this. If I said these words to my wife, she would take it badly, but when she reads it, I will tell her I wrote it. — Omaha, Neb.

Dear Omaha: How could any woman be upset when her husband says he wants to grow old with her? Weight is a tricky issue and a do-it-yourself project. And 100 pounds might seem overwhelming. If you indicate disapproval of her food choices, it makes her feel terrible, which only makes her want to eat. Your wife is aware of her weight and undoubtedly wants to drop some pounds.

Could you take over more of the cooking and grocery shopping so there are healthier meals and snacks? Would she take a romantic walk with you after dinner? Would she join Weight Watchers or Overeaters Anonymous? Would she download an app on her phone to keep track of her calories and exercise?

When you show her this letter, ask how you can help her. We hope she will work on it, but if she refuses, please know there is nothing more you can do. Love her as is.

Dear Annie: “Concerned in Galesburg, Ill.” disapproved of parents taking photographs of their babies without clothing on. We once had an attorney general who went around putting diapers on statues of naked people. I’ve often wondered who his constituents were. — Babies Are Adorable

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 Third St., Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.

Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar

LEAVE A COMMENT

Discussion | No comments

The Daily Republic does not necessarily condone the comments here, nor does it review every post. Read our full policy

.

Solano News

Fairfield labor pact wins City Council OK

By Ryan McCarthy | From Page: A1 | Gallery

 
 
County supervisors hear from Solano grand jury

By Barry Eberling | From Page: A3

2 hurt after traffic signal apparently malfunctions

By Brad Stanhope | From Page: A3

 
Solano leaders feel left out of Delta decision-making

By Barry Eberling | From Page: A3

Vacaville man to stand trial on arson allegations

By Jess Sullivan | From Page: A4

 
Polk first to file for Fairfield council

By Ryan McCarthy | From Page: A4

Governor signs 2 bills by Frazier into law

By Ryan McCarthy | From Page: A5

 
Dally seeks to retain seat on Vacaville school board

By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A5

Carpenters training center set to expand in Fairfield

By Barry Eberling | From Page: A5, 4 Comments | Gallery

 
2 Vacaville homes hit by gunfire

By Barry Eberling | From Page: A6, 2 Comments

 
Library friends set spring book sale

By Ryan McCarthy | From Page: A6

 
Video chair exercise class returns to senior center

By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A6

 
Man, woman, comic and dance contest primed for box office

By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A7

Vice Mayor Vaccaro will attend LA conference

By Ryan McCarthy | From Page: A8

 
Rockville Trails hike on August calendar

By Barry Eberling | From Page: A8 | Gallery

 
Mayor’s Commission on Crime hears from community

By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A12, 3 Comments | Gallery

.

US / World

Dueling rulings: Courts split on health law clash

By The Associated Press | From Page: A1

 
IRS employee charged with identity theft

By The Associated Press | From Page: A9

Assailants sought in fatal train platform beating

By The Associated Press | From Page: A9

 
Senate, House on collision course on border money

By The Associated Press | From Page: B9

ACLU may fight for California migrant shelter

By The Associated Press | From Page: B9

 
Board puts soda tax before San Francisco voters

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10

George Harrison memorial tree killed by beetles

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10, 1 Comment

 
California agency to consider hiring “water cops”

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10

Gaza blockade key to any Israel-Hamas truce deal

By The Associated Press | From Page: B10

 
Mexican-born professor eyed for state high court

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10 | Gallery

Airlines ban flights to Israel after rocket strike

By The Associated Press | From Page: B10

 
AP source: Thieves got into 1K StubHub accounts

By The Associated Press | From Page: A12

Obama nominee McDonald pledges to ‘transform’ VA

By The Associated Press | From Page: A12

 
Body of missing S. Korean shipping tycoon found

By The Associated Press | From Page: A12

Crews make gains on massive Washington wildfire

By The Associated Press | From Page: A12

 
11 parents of Nigeria’s abducted girls die

By The Associated Press | From Page: A12

Plane crash bodies removed from war zone

By The Associated Press | From Page: A13

 
Lax security at crash site hampers investigations

By The Associated Press | From Page: A13

.

Opinion

Will history repeat in child immigrant crisis?

By Thomas Elias | From Page: A11

 
 
Walmart donation benefits Meals on Wheels

By Letter to the Editor | From Page: A11, 1 Comment

Batson’s column on Mideast peace is wrong

By Letter to the Editor | From Page: A11, 5 Comments

 
Fix our problems first

By Letter to the Editor | From Page: A11

.

Living

Today in History for July 23, 2014

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

 
Community Calendar: July 23, 2014

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A2

How to argue appropriately with your mate

By Barton Goldsmith | From Page: A2

 
A summer sausage roll with a triple dose of fennel

By The Associated Press | From Page: B6

10 Things: 10 fresh ways to use fresh blueberries

By J.M. Hirsch | From Page: B6

 
Horoscopes for July 23, 2014

By Holiday Mathis | From Page: B6

Bulking up the classic BLT without adding fat

By Sara Moulton | From Page: B6

 
I’m tired of my parents judging me because of who I date

By Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar | From Page: B6

.

Entertainment

‘X-Men’ VR experience coming to Comic-Con

By The Associated Press | From Page: A7

 
‘Downton Abbey’ back on Jan. 4 for season 5

By The Associated Press | From Page: A7

TVGrid

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B8

 
.

Sports

Giants beat Phillies 9-6 in 14 innings

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1 | Gallery

 
A’s agree to 10-year lease to stay in Oakland

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

Raiders enter camp with ‘chip’ on shoulders

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
49ers start fresh after forgettable offseason

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
Seahawks start atop AP Pro32 rankings

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

Selig still waiting on Tommy John report

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

 
AP source: Cavs to sign Andrew Wiggins to contract

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

Paterno son, other former assistant sue Penn State

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

 
Pyrenees please Nibali, Rogers in Tour Stage 16

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3 | Gallery

Warriors announce Brandon Rush’s signing

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

 
CEO: Rivers to quit Clippers if Sterling stays

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

Racehorse owned by Britain’s queen fails dope test

By The Associated Press | From Page: B3

 
Mudcats score early, get 7-3 win over South Bay Storm

By Daily Republic staff | From Page: B3

.

Business

Ackman goes after Herbalife’s nutrition clubs

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8, 1 Comment

 
China meat scandal hits Starbucks, Burger King

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

Solid earnings drive more gains in US stocks

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

 
Microsoft 4Q earnings hurt by Nokia acquisition

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

Apple post biggest earnings gain in nearly 2 years

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

 
One in every 25 New Yorkers is a millionaire, study says

By Los Angeles Times | From Page: B8

California firm issues nationwide fruit recall

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10

 
.

Obituaries

Joseph Ross Smith Jr.

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

 
John Klefstad

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

Shirley T. ‘Mac’ McFadden

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4, 2 Comments

 
.

Comics

Dilbert

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Blondie

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Frank and Ernest

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Garfield

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Rose is Rose

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Sally Forth

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Beetle Bailey

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
B.C.

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Baldo

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Wizard of Id

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Baby Blues

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Peanuts

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Zits

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Pickles

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

For Better or Worse

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Get Fuzzy

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Word Sleuth

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
Cryptoquote

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

Bridge

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
Sudoku

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6