Thursday, March 5, 2015
FAIRFIELD-SUISUN, CALIFORNIA
99 CENTS

My mother-in-law is upset because I’m dating again. What should I do?

By
From page B5 | November 21, 2012 |

Dear Annie: I was married to my husband for 31 years. Two years ago, he was killed in an accident. I loved him to the moon and back and miss him terribly.

Eight months later, my daughter introduced me to a nice gentleman. He is a sweet man, and we have been seeing each other ever since. Unfortunately, my mother-in-law is upset and bitter because of it. She thinks I did not wait long enough after my husband’s death. What gets me is that one of her daughters just left her husband a couple of months ago, is not yet divorced and already has a boyfriend moving in with her. That doesn’t seem to bother my mother-in-law.

I love my in-laws, but they have to realize that my path in life is changing, and I have to do what is right for me. How do I get my mother-in-law to understand? Do I just leave it alone and live my life? — Confused Daughter-in-Law

Dear Confused: Parents grieve in their own way, and the loss of a child is different from that of a spouse. No amount of mourning would be “long enough” for your mother-in-law. But it is unrealistic and unfair for her to expect you to remain alone indefinitely. Try to bring your in-laws into your new life. Tell them how much you love them and how you will never stop loving their son, but you don’t think he would want you to be alone. Explain that you hope they will always be part of your life. Introduce them to your new man. Be gentle and compassionate, but don’t let them dictate your future.

Dear Annie: While waiting in a line at a deli, a young girl ahead of me was dressed in today’s typical tight, skimpy shorts. She was leaning against the deli case, and I noticed she had a sizable tattoo just above her very clearly exposed rear cleavage. Naturally, I glanced at it briefly and read what it said. I did not gawk or ogle. It was simply normal curiosity.

I was cautioned by a friend who warned me that doing so could be considered sexual harassment. My argument is that when someone essentially has a billboard on their butt, it’s an invitation for others to peruse it. To me, people who have multiple exposed tattoos should expect others to look them over. What’s your take on this? — A Guy in Virginia

Dear Guy: In most instances, body art is intended to be noticed. Discreet glancing is fine. Ogling is not. Staring, making comments, whistling, smacking your lips or touching the other person are definite no-nos. You can look, but do so respectfully.

Dear Annie: “New Sibling” discovered that he had a half-brother and wanted to know whether it was too late to form a relationship over his father’s objections.

After my mother died, I found out at age 42 that I was a child from a first marriage. My stepdad adopted me and changed my name to his. I went on a search and found half-brothers from my biological father’s other marriages. One half-brother thought it was terrible that I was searching, but another of my half-brothers, only five months younger, was thrilled to have a new sister. We have a wonderful relationship.

So, it’s never too late. And I agree with your advice that this is not Dad’s decision. Yes, I’m angry that my birth information was hidden from me and that I never had the opportunity to meet my biological father. My new half-brother and I have often wondered whether any of the wives knew about the others. I have one more brother we haven’t found, and I’m guessing he was also adopted and had his name changed. — California Sister

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to [email protected], or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 Third St., Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.

Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar

LEAVE A COMMENT

Discussion | No comments

The Daily Republic does not necessarily condone the comments here, nor does it review every post. Read our full policy

.

Solano News

 
Show resilience in the face of adversity

By Mayrene Bates | From Page: A2

 
Vacaville police slate annual awards ceremony

By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A3

Limited damage to apartment from carport fire

By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A3 | Gallery

 
Students sample industry choices during school career fair

By Glen Faison | From Page: A3 | Gallery

 
Real McCoy II Ferry set for maintenance

By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A3

 
Jury convicts ex-con who served as own lawyer

By Jess Sullivan | From Page: A4

Red Carpet Gala to benefit theater foundation

By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A4

 
Pet remembrance event set in Vallejo

By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A4

 
Friday concert benefits Families Helping Families

By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A4

 
Vallejo police arrest 4 in connection with 3 killings

By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A4

 
National Red Cross Month celebrates heroes

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

Il Fiorello schedules citrus class

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4, 1 Comment

 
Suisun City police log: Tuesday, March 3, 2015

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A10

Fairfield police log: Tuesday, March 3, 2015

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A10

 
.

US / World

 
Justices sharply divided over health care law subsidies

By The Associated Press | From Page: A1

 
California lawmaker pushes child care worker vaccinations

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

 
Children in Southern California breathing easier, study says

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4 | Gallery

Failures by 3 governments preceded homeless man’s death

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4, 1 Comment | Gallery

 
Second Los Angeles hospital reports ‘superbug’ infections

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

 
A defiant Alabama regains ground against gay marriage

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
How much sugar is in that? 7 foods with added sugar

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5 | Gallery

 
Obama signs Homeland Security funding bill into law

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5, 1 Comment

House panel issues subpoena for Clinton’s personal emails

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Microsoft co-founder says he found sunken Japan WWII warship

By The Associated Press | From Page: A6

 
Coal mine blast kills at least 24 in war-torn east Ukraine

By The Associated Press | From Page: A6 | Gallery

.

Living

Today in History: March 5, 2015

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

 
Community Calendar: March 5, 2015

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A2

Horoscopes: March 5, 2015

By Holiday Mathis | From Page: A9

 
I can’t tell if I still want to be married, or just don’t want to be alone

By Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar | From Page: A9

.

Entertainment

DiCaprio partners with Netflix for series of documentaries

By The Associated Press | From Page: B4

 
‘Guardians of the Galaxy’ tops MTV Movie Awards nominations

By The Associated Press | From Page: B4

Glen Campbell children fighting wife’s control of affairs

By The Associated Press | From Page: B4 | Gallery

 
.

Sports

 
Posey has 2-run double in Giants’ 9-2 loss to A’s

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
Local report: Vanden softball slips by Rodriguez with late run

By Daily Republic staff | From Page: B1

Curry shoots Warriors to 102-93 victory over Bucks

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
‘It WAS him': Defense admits Tsarnaev bombed Boston Marathon

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

With Peterson’s status in question, Vikings pay a visit

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
NFL stadium supporters in LA suburb file ballot paperwork

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Alex Johnson, AL batting champ in 1970, dies at age 72

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Goodell: NFL responsible for Super Bowl seating problems

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Former player Nate Jackson calls for NFL to allow marijuana

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Phoenix to install tire barriers before NASCAR visit

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Pirelli sticks with same tire choices for first 4 F1 races

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
AP Source: Peyton Manning returning for 18th NFL season

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

NCAA reports big jump in home runs with new flat-seam ball

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
MLS, players agree in principle to 5-year deal

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Prosecutors can’t bring up Florida shooting in ex-NFLer case

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Vikings agree to trade Cassel to Bills

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Scott opens a season of change at Doral

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
.

Business

.

Obituaries

Aaron D. Malave

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4, 1 Comment

 
Cesar Luis Garcia-Regalado

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

Rodolfo Landabora Porquez

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4, 1 Comment

 
.

Comics

Peanuts

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
Pickles

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

Baldo

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
Dilbert

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

Baby Blues

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
Beetle Bailey

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

Frank and Ernest

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
B.C.

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

Garfield

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
Rose is Rose

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

For Better or Worse

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
Zits

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

Blondie

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
Wizard of Id

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

Get Fuzzy

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
Sally Forth

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

Cryptoquote

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A9

 
Crossword

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A9

Bridge

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A9

 
Word Sleuth

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A9

Sudoku

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A9