Monday, April 21, 2014
FAIRFIELD-SUISUN, CALIFORNIA
99 CENTS

My husband of 44 years got a facelift, reconnected with a high school girlfriend

Dear Annie: After 44 years of marriage, I can no longer trust my husband. “Steve” reconnected with a high school flame, and the end result was late-night emails, texts and calls. He even bought throwaway phones so they could stay in touch and meet out of town.

We went for counseling, and Steve took a stack of note cards to the first session with ultimatums for me. He accused me of being a lesbian and having affairs with women at work and in our neighborhood. He then shared the intimate details of our sessions with his old flame and invited her to come along! He wrote long multiple-page letters and slipped them to my therapist when he thought I wasn’t watching. Recently, Steve spent $12,000 of our money on a facelift, and he has set up at least 10 email accounts to hide things from me.

He finally promised to cut off communication with this woman unless it was about the upcoming high school reunion. We began to put things back together, and then he again initiated intimate contact with her and went to our high school reunion without me.

Is there any hope of trusting this man again? Or at age 64, am I looking at moving on? — The Faithful Wife

Dear Faithful: Steve seems to be going through a major midlife crisis. The old flame makes him feel as if he’s a teenager again. And the facelift was intended to make him look like one. Will he ever return to Earth? There are no guarantees. Please don’t plan your life around what Steve may or may not do in the future. Get some counseling on your own, see a lawyer about protecting yourself, and figure out whether you are better off with or without him right now.

Dear Annie: I live in a small community where many people volunteer for countless jobs, giving of their time and talents. I have a friend who is becoming increasingly critical of everyone’s efforts, and it is depressing to be in her company.

How do I tell her that we are tired of her constant complaining while still remaining her friend? I’m taking out my hearing aids at our next encounter. — Florida

Dear Florida: Some people, as they age, turn into chronic complainers. Sometimes there are medical reasons, but often, it’s simply how they are. You could nicely mention to your friend that she seems terribly unhappy because nothing pleases her these days, and then suggest she see her doctor for a thorough checkup. We hope it helps.

Dear Annie: “Worried Grandma” was concerned about her granddaughter, “Kelly,” who had difficulty modulating her voice and felt that men were turned off by her loud personality.

Please tell her to look into whether Kelly has Asperger syndrome, a form of high-functioning autism. Asperger’s often goes undiagnosed until later in life, but its primary symptom is extreme social awkwardness and an inability to appropriately “read” the social cues of others.

With special training, Kelly can learn how to modify her behavior and pick up on these social cues. But it’s unlikely she can do it on her own. A correct diagnosis can go a long way toward repairing her self-esteem. I hope her parents will get Kelly the help she needs to succeed in this world. — Vermont Professor

Dear Vermont: Thanks for your input. It is possible that Kelly has a mild form of Asperger’s, although she should see a medical professional to find out whether this is the case. If it is, she can contact aspergersyndrome.org for more information.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 Third St., Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.

Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar

LEAVE A COMMENT

Discussion | No comments

The Daily Republic does not necessarily condone the comments here, nor does it review every post. Read our full policy

.

Solano News

Jelly Belly artist finds her work sweet

By Ian Thompson | From Page: A1 | Gallery

 
Hundreds turn out for Kroc Easter Egg hunt

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A1

Rodriguez musicians win big in Reno

By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A1

 
 
Heroes for Hire event goes haywire

By Tony Wade | From Page: A2

Best of the best compete at dog show

By Adrienne Harris | From Page: A3 | Gallery

 
Tour past, present, future in Mountain View

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A3

9th Annual Peace Summit on calendar

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A3

 
4-H Paper Clover Campaign starts

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A3

Center offers baby mammal care class

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A3

 
Fairfield police arrest 6 in alcohol sting

By Adrienne Harris | From Page: A3

Event allows for safe medication disposal

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

 
Silent movie night set in Rio Vista

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

Local government meetings

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

 
Il Fiorello to host mushroom class

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

Club plans home garden tour in Fairfield

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

 
Suisun City to host 3rd annual MS walk

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

Church offers document shredding

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

 
Kids Fishing Derby to take place Saturday

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

 
Suisun City police log: April 19, 2014

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A9

Fairfield police log: April 19, 2014

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A9

 
Fairfield police log: April 18, 2014

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A9

Suisun City police log: April 18, 2014

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A9

 
North Bay Pediatrics marks anniversary

By Barry Eberling | From Page: A11

Networking event at Solano College

By Barry Eberling | From Page: A11

 
Street-sweeping dealership comes to Fairfield

By Barry Eberling | From Page: A11, 1 Comment | Gallery

Firm facilitates building lease in Fairfield

By Barry Eberling | From Page: A11

 
Weather for Monday, April 21, 2014

By Daily Republic staff | From Page: B12

.

US / World

Bid, Dick, bid: ‘Dick and Jane’ artworks for sale

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

 
Bee colonies damaged after almond pollination

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

Sleeping girl killed after car drives into home

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Nurse in critical condition after stabbing

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

Recreation areas reopening after Yosemite fire

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Country music singer Kevin Sharp dies at age 43

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

Study: Fuels from corn waste not better than gas

By The Associated Press | From Page: A6

 
Delay in ferry evacuation puzzles maritime experts

By The Associated Press | From Page: A7

Transcript of SKorea ship sinking: ‘We can’t move’

By The Associated Press | From Page: A7

 
Transcript reveals confusion over ferry evacuation

By The Associated Press | From Page: A7

.

Opinion

Why Hillary? The public awaits her answer

By Ann McFeatters | From Page: A8

 
Knowledge, religion and the hard work of faith

By Cynthia M. Allen | From Page: A8

Question of the week: Will Flight 370 be found?

By Daily Republic | From Page: A8

 
Legislature critic is selective

By Letter to the Editor | From Page: A8

Editorial Cartoon for April 21, 2014

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
Local voices, important choices

By Rod Keck | From Page: A8

.

Living

Community Calendar: April 21, 2014

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A2

 
Today in History for April 21, 2014

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

Horoscopes for April 21, 2014

By Holiday Mathis | From Page: B5

 
My friend’s wife drinks too much, verbally abuses her husband

By Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar | From Page: B5

Horoscopes for April 22, 2014

By Holiday Mathis | From Page: B7

 
.

Entertainment

‘Capt. America’ tops box office for third week

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10

 
TVGrid April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A10

TVGrid April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A11

 
.

Sports

Sharks take 2-0 series lead with 7-2 win vs. Kings

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1 | Gallery

 
Posey, Lincecum lead Giants to 4-3 win

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1 | Gallery

Chavez gets 1st win, A’s complete sweep of Astros

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
Young Clippers try to mature against Warriors

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1 | Gallery

 
NBA: Refs missed foul call in Warriors-Clippers

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

Westwood wins Malaysian Open

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Wawrinka beats Federer to win Monte Carlo Masters

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

After bombs, Boston Marathon under tight security

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Prep baseball: Pair of 10-run innings powers Vikings to win

By Daily Republic staff | From Page: B2

Red Sox remember Boston Marathon victims

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Prizefighter Rubin ‘Hurricane’ Carter dies at 76

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2 | Gallery

Kuchar rallies from 4 back to win RBC Heritage

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2 | Gallery

 
Jimenez closes with 67 to win Greater Gwinnett

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Aldridge leads Portland over Houston 122-120 in OT

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

Nene dominates, Wizards rally past Bulls, 102-93

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8 | Gallery

 
James, Wade lead Heat past Bobcats 99-88 in Game 1

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

Duncan scores 27 points, Spurs beat Mavs 90-85

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

 
.

Business

 
.

Obituaries

Anne Irene Elizabeth Fulgoni

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4, 2 Comments

 
.

Comics

Beetle Bailey April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Zits April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Peanuts April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Frank and Ernest April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Baldo April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Pickles April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Blondie April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
For Better or Worse April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Baby Blues April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Dilbert April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Get Fuzzy April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Sally Forth April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Rose is Rose April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
B.C. April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Garfield April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Wizard Of Id April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Word Sleuth April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Sudoku April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Bridge April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Cryptoquote April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Crossword April 21

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Beetle Bailey April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

Get Fuzzy April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
For Better or Worse April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

Garfield April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
Rose is Rose April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

Sally Forth April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
Frank and Ernest April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

Pickles April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
Zits April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

Peanuts April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
B.C. April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

Blondie April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
Baldo April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

Dilbert April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
Wizard Of Id April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

Baby Blues April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
Word Sleuth April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B7

Sudoku April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B7

 
Cryptoquote April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B7

Crossword April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B7

 
Bridge April 22

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B7