Sunday, March 1, 2015
FAIRFIELD-SUISUN, CALIFORNIA
99 CENTS

I have proof that my son’s wife is cheating. Should I show it to him?

Dear Annie: Thirteen years ago, my son met “Nadia.” She became pregnant and brought my first beautiful grandchild into the world. After they married, I did many things for her and enjoyed her company. They now have another child, a son who is 8.

Nadia was fired from her job after breaking some rules – I don’t know which ones – and hasn’t worked since. She also doesn’t cook, clean or do laundry. My son does all of these things after a full day at work and then helps the kids with their homework and bedtime routines.

I’m a former private investigator. A few years ago, I caught Nadia cheating and discovered that the other man lived with his mother and had custody of his child. I didn’t want my grandchildren to have divorced parents, so instead of telling my son, I called this man’s mother. I told her to end things, or I’d inform her ex-daughter-in-law about the affair and she could gain custody of those kids. The affair ended.

Last year, I noticed that Nadia was paying a lot of attention to my granddaughter’s horse trainer. A mutual friend told me that Nadia has been sleeping with this man for two years. Nadia texted graphic details to this friend, which she forwarded to me.

The friend told my son about the affair, and he sent Nadia packing. But she convinced him that the friend was lying, and he took her back. Annie, I have the proof in those text messages, but I don’t think my son can handle it. Their home life is a disaster. My grandson has stress migraines, and my granddaughter is angry.

It upsets me terribly to see my son treated in such a degrading way. Do I share the truth or wait until the children are grown? — Grandmother in Distress

Dear Grandmother: We understand your concern, but you are already overly involved in your son’s messed-up marriage. Please don’t put evidence in front of him, forcing him to confront a situation he is trying to deal with in his own way. The very best thing you can do is encourage your son to get his family into counseling. Explain that it is for the children’s sake. They are truly suffering.

Dear Annie: My son and his fiancee mailed wedding invitations, and for some reason, friends and relatives sent back the RSVP cards and included additional guests who were not listed on the invitation. Why do people assume they can do this?

My son now has to call each one and tell them they cannot bring extra guests. Should there have been a note in the invitation stating that the wedding venue is small and seating is limited? — Aggravated Mother

Dear Aggravated: No. Your son is handling this correctly by calling. We don’t know whether it is simply colossal nerve, a sense of entitlement, the fact that weddings have become less formal or that TV shows and movies often show invited guests bringing along their friends, but it is not uncommon for people to assume it’s OK to add extra people to the RSVP. It is not.

Dear Annie: Thanks for printing the letter from “Saddened.” I am so relieved to know I am not the only husband with the same dilemma. It’s hard for a male to confess he has these feelings and needs without sounding like a nag. I wish there was an answer.

Everything the writer said is the same at my home, including my deep love for my very uninterested wife of 44 years. I would show her this column, but it would only start tears. If she would just initiate holding hands or give me an occasional kiss, that would be so cool. I know she truly loves me, but she feels no need for physical intimacy. — O.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to [email protected], or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 Third St., Hermosa Beach, CA 90254.

Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar

LEAVE A COMMENT

Discussion | No comments

The Daily Republic does not necessarily condone the comments here, nor does it review every post. Read our full policy

.

Solano News

School bands compete in Pageantry on Parade

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A1 | Gallery

 
Peace and patience: Quilters gear up for show

By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: C1Comments are off for this post

 
Calling someone a ‘smoker’ is hilarious

By Brad Stanhope | From Page: A2

 
Conservancy plans next Quail Ridge Reserve walk

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A3

 
Police seek suspect in armed robbery

By Bill Hicks | From Page: A3

4-H Presentation Day brings fun, education to Fairfield

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A3 | Gallery

 
What you eat can affect your medications

By Marilyn Ranson | From Page: C4

 
CAASC 18th Annual Chinese New Year and Scholarship Celebration

By Steve Reczkowski | From Page: A5 | Gallery

Rollover in Suisun City

By Aaron Rosenblatt | From Page: A5 | Gallery

 
State schedules ramp closure at freeway project site

By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A5

Vigil doesn’t pan out amid concerns

By Bill Hicks | From Page: A5

 
Appointments on tap for Board of Supervisors meet

By Kevin W. Green | From Page: A5

Tri-City NAACP honors community members at gala event

By Bill Hicks | From Page: A5 | Gallery

 
NY, SF town house prices through the roof

By Bud Stevenson | From Page: B7

 
Parker Road restaurant does brisk business

By Susan Hiland | From Page: B7

 
Fairfield police log: Feb. 27, 2015

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A9

Suisun City police log: Feb. 27, 2015

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A9

 
Airmen with local ties finish basic training

By Nick DeCicco | From Page: B10

Force draws many from South, middle class

By Tom Philpott | From Page: B10

 
.

US / World

Christie to Calif. Republicans: No rush to pick 2016 nominee

By The Associated Press | From Page: A1

 
US missionary abducted in Nigeria is courageous, friends say

By The Associated Press | From Page: C3

Dress that ‘greatly resembles’ stolen Nyong’o gown found

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Weekend storm drops snow, rain, hail in California

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

Churches, synagogues, mosques bear tough New England winter

By The Associated Press | From Page: A6

 
Mother charged in death of infant found in California swamp

By The Associated Press | From Page: A6

Hyundai recalls 263,000 cars due to power-steering problem

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10

 
Blind dog rescued after being lost for 2 weeks in the cold

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10

Details about proposed national monuments in California

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10

 
National monument supporters in California get antsy

By The Associated Press | From Page: A10

US drone strike in Yemen kills 3 suspected al-Qaida fighters

By The Associated Press | From Page: A11

 
Greece will not seek another bailout, prime minister says

By The Associated Press | From Page: A11

Attacks kill 37 people in and north of Iraq’s capital

By The Associated Press | From Page: A11

 
Nemtsov a possible ‘sacrificial victim,’ investigators say

By The Associated Press | From Page: A12

.

Opinion

Editorial Cartoon: March 1, 2015

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
Sound off for March 1, 2015

By Daily Republic | From Page: A8

 
New school funding plan remains on bumpy path

By Dan Walters | From Page: A8

Even Gruber deserves a break sometimes

By Megan Mcardle | From Page: A8

 
I might just vote for a Democrat next time around

By Letter to the Editor | From Page: A8, 1 Comment

Aging Fairfield housing agency faltering

By Letter to the Editor | From Page: A8

 
.

Living

Today in History: March 1, 2015

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

 
Community Calendar: March 1, 2015

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A2

With numbers falling, Houston-area nuns’ future uncertain

By The Associated Press | From Page: C3

 
Horoscopes: March 1, 2015

By Holiday Mathis | From Page: C4

Kidney Walk participation helped give me a positive outlook on life

By Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar | From Page: C4

 
.

Entertainment

Take a look – Dr. Seuss has a new book

By The Associated Press | From Page: C2

 
Publisher launches line of Warhol e-books

By The Associated Press | From Page: C2

Q&A: Opera star Deborah Voigt writes of turbulent life

By The Associated Press | From Page: C2Comments are off for this post

 
PUBLISHERS WEEKLY BEST-SELLERS

By The Associated Press | From Page: C2

Review: ‘The Girl on the Train’ has realistic plot

By The Associated Press | From Page: C2Comments are off for this post

 
TVGrid

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B11

.

Sports

Vikings girls looking for first section title

By Paul Farmer | From Page: B1 | Gallery

 
Local Report: Vaca’s Aquino wins Masters wrestling title

By Daily Republic staff | From Page: B1

Phegley hopes his style will catch on in Oakland

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
A year after meeting Tiger, Indian golfer on the rise

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

Jeff Gordon takes a final spin at track that meant so much

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
Players’ union head: future spring games in Cuba possible

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Harrington takes 36-hole lead, then more rain in Florida

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Defending champ Federer beats Djokovic to retain Dubai title

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Safarova beats Azarenka to win the Qatar Open

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Environmental activists disrupt meeting by Olympic officials

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Hamilton hones Mercedes with fastest time at F1 testing

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Thunder’s Russell Westbrook has surgery on cheekbone

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Anthony Mason, rugged forward of 1990s Knicks, dies at 48

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Warriors center Festus Ezeli suspended for a game

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Reichelt leads Austrian World Cup downhill sweep

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Harvick wins Xfinity race at Atlanta for 3rd year in a row

By The Associated Press | From Page: B4

Stolen No. 44 NASCAR race car found in suburban Atlanta

By The Associated Press | From Page: B4

 
.

Business

Fruits and vegetables get a star-studded marketing push

By The Associated Press | From Page: B7

 
For many in US, cash saved at gas pump is staying in pockets

By The Associated Press | From Page: B7

Nevada casinos keep $953.7 million in winnings in January

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

 
Historic snows causing headaches for real estate industry

By The Associated Press | From Page: B8

Boy, 13, builds Braille printer with Legos, starts company

By The Associated Press | From Page: B9Comments are off for this post

 
Recalls this week: hand trucks, ceiling fans

By The Associated Press | From Page: B9

Review: Freedom! These smartwatches leave the phone behind

By The Associated Press | From Page: B9

 
Greek prime minister rules out third bailout

By The Associated Press | From Page: B9

AP Exclusive: Fuel-hauling trains could derail at 10 a year

By The Associated Press | From Page: B12 | Gallery

 
.

Obituaries

John W. Van Wart

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

 
Lester Singer

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

Virgil Albert Hanson

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A4

 
Leah E. Hoffman

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

Thomas Browning

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4, 1 Comment

 
Jacqueline Mendes

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

.

Comics