Monday, January 26, 2015
FAIRFIELD-SUISUN, CALIFORNIA
99 CENTS

I’m still angry at my ex-sister-in-law for making a pass at my husband

By
From page A9 | February 14, 2014 |

Dear Readers: Happy Valentine’s Day to one and all, along with our special good wishes to the veterans in VA hospitals around the country. And our particular thanks to those readers who have taken the time to send valentines, visit the vets and volunteer at VA facilities. Bless each and every one of you.

Dear Annie: Thirty years ago, my husband’s sister-in-law made a pass at him. They worked at the same place, so when he turned her down, she made his life a living hell. He ended up quitting the job, and we left town. She and my brother-in-law are divorced now, but we see her occasionally at family gatherings.

This woman has been hospitalized twice for breakdowns. Most of the family is cordial to her, knowing that a lot of what she did in the past was due to her illness. When her meds are working and she is feeling stable, she reaches out to those she has hurt to make amends. She reached out to my husband, tearfully admitting that she knows she is the reason we left, and has asked for forgiveness.

She now thinks everything is just fine. The problem is, she has never reached out to me to apologize for the way she upended my life. She doesn’t know my husband told me what happened. Even after all these years, I have a hard time smiling and pretending everything is hunky-dory.

I have forgiven her, but forgetting is something else, and every time I see her, the old anger comes back. My husband agrees that nothing would be gained by bringing these things up again. Any suggestions for moving past this in a positive way? — Wronged but Silent in Wisconsin

Dear Wronged: You haven’t actually forgiven her, because her presence still makes you angry. If you believe an apology from her would make a difference, you should calmly let her know. But if you don’t think it matters one way or the other, please consider talking this through with a professional who can help you let go of the past completely.

Dear Annie: We have 5-year-old twins. We enrolled them in a swimming class last year. Our son had a bad experience and didn’t want to continue. Our daughter, however, loved it and is doing great. After a couple of months, our son decided to return to classes. (We think he was jealous of his sister’s achievement.) Naturally, he is a level behind her. He now cries and wants to be on her level.

We think it would be unfair to hold our daughter back for a while so her brother can catch up. However, if we do hold her back, we can enroll them in semi-private lessons together, saving money as well as transportation time. It also solves the problem of our son’s jealousy. Should we do it? — Swimmers Parents

Dear Parents: As a general rule, it is never a good idea to force kids to accomplish anything at the same speed, moving them forward and back so one isn’t jealous of the other. This is a recipe for a lifetime of craziness and resentment. If you wish to put both children in the same class because you want to save money and time, that is a different issue and certainly justifiable. If the lessons are semi-private, your daughter should be able to move ahead at her own speed, which is not the same as holding her back.

Dear Annie: I believe you overlooked something in your response to “Getting This Off My Chest.”

The writer stated that he is positive his wife got pregnant intentionally. It takes two! Even if she “assures” him that it is a “safe” time of the month, that’s no guarantee. Other precautions should be taken. It’s a shared responsibility — Albany, N.Y.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please email your questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 Third St., Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. 

Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar

LEAVE A COMMENT

Discussion | No comments

The Daily Republic does not necessarily condone the comments here, nor does it review every post. Read our full policy

.

Solano News

Teen finds entrepreneurial path at young age

By Susan Winlow | From Page: A1, 2 Comments | Gallery

 
Time for Relay for Life kickoff event

By Tony Wade | From Page: A2

 
Suisun Senior Center offers monthly dance

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A3

 
 
Wedding Faire offers one-stop browsing for couples

By Amy Maginnis-Honey | From Page: A3, 1 Comment | Gallery

Crab feed tradition continues this week

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A3

 
Local government agencies post meeting times

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A3

Fairfield schedules workshop on downtown plan

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A3

 
.

US / World

 
US gas prices fell 13 cents per gallon, but expected to rise

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

 
2 Marines identified in deadly California helicopter crash

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

Santa Ana winds knock out power to thousands in California

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

 
Boy shot by Los Angeles deputies treated for graze wound

By The Associated Press | From Page: A4

Obama to seek wilderness designation for Alaska refuge

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Navy wants to increase use of sonar-emitting buoys

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Ukraine: Phone calls prove rebels attacked city, killed 30

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

Zambia: Edgar Lungu sworn in as new president

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Greek radical left wins election, threatening market turmoil

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

‘Potentially historic’ storm headed for Northeast

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Balloon crew launches in bid to break 2 major records

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

Obama: Counterterrorism operations in Yemen not affected

By The Associated Press | From Page: A5

 
Zoo offers creepy way for lovelorn to get even with exes

By The Associated Press | From Page: A9

 
.

Opinion

Democracy or republic?

By Earl Heal | From Page: A8, 7 Comments

 
Editorial Cartoon: Jan. 26, 2015

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A8

 
Do elected officials get it?

By Letter to the Editor | From Page: A8, 15 Comments

 
.

Living

Community Calendar: Jan. 26, 2015

By Susan Hiland | From Page: A2

 
Today in History: Jan. 26, 2015

By The Associated Press | From Page: A2

Horoscope Jan. 27, 2015

By Holiday Mathis | From Page: B5

 
My sister is jobless and homeless and I’m not sure how to help

By Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar | From Page: A7

 
Horoscope Jan. 26, 2015

By Holiday Mathis | From Page: A7

.

Entertainment

TVGrid Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B6

 
TVGrid Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B7

 
Miss Colombia crowned Miss Universe in Miami

By The Associated Press | From Page: B7

‘Birdman’ tops SAG Awards, Redmayne upsets Keaton

By The Associated Press | From Page: B7

 
Complete list of winners at 21st annual SAG Awards

By The Associated Press | From Page: B7

.

Sports

Curry leads Warriors to 19th straight home win

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
Serena Williams to meet Cibulkova in Aussie Open quarters

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
Watt gets 2 turnovers, dances in friendly Pro Bowl

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

Tavares scores 4, Team Toews outscores Team Foligno, 17-12

By The Associated Press | From Page: B1

 
Chip Ganassi Racing’s ‘star car’ wins Rolex 24 at Daytona

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Patriots’ Browner gets a 2nd chance at a Super Bowl ring

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Family attorney: Cubs great Ernie Banks died of heart attack

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Bill Haas pulls away to win Humana Challenge

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Jeff Gordon to be Fox guest analyst during XFINITY season

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Sherman doubts any punishment ahead for Patriots

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
AP Source: Browns WR Josh Gordon fails another drug test

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

AP Interview: Selig says MLB could expand internationally

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
Coach K gets 1,000th win as No. 5 Duke tops St. John’s 77-68

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

Quinn has led Seattle to record-setting defense

By The Associated Press | From Page: B2

 
.

Business

.

Obituaries

Thomas Clark

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4

 
Don Johnson

By Nancy Green | From Page: A4, 8 Comments

.

Comics

Sally Forth Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Baldo Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Wizard of Id Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Rose is Rose Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Frank and Ernest Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Beetle Bailey Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Blondie Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Get Fuzzy Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Zits Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
B.C. Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Peanuts Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
For Better or Worse Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Dilbert Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Garfield Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Baby Blues Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

 
Pickles Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B4

Sudoku Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Cryptoquote Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Bridge Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Crossword Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

Word Sleuth Jan 27

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: B5

 
Baby Blues Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Rose is Rose Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Sally Forth Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Dilbert Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Zits Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Wizard of Id Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Get Fuzzy Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Beetle Bailey Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Pickles Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Garfield Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
B.C. Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

For Better or Worse Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Peanuts Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Frank and Ernest Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Blondie Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

Baldo Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A6

 
Word Sleuth Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A7

Crossword Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A7

 
Sudoku Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A7

Cryptoquote Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A7

 
Bridge Jan 26

By Daily Republic Syndicated Content | From Page: A7